Change

Can People Really Change?
You've seen both sides of the argument: 50 or 80 year olds who seem like the same person they were at 18 and others who undergo a caterpillar-to-butterfly sort of change overnight. The answer? Yes, people can change, but it often takes two things.

Part I
To start on the right foot, you should make an important distinction between what's really you and what's just learned behavior.

What Part Changes?
Some emotions and reactions are learned behavior and can always change through education, experience, and attitude shifts. Once you reach a new understanding, you can't help but change.

Fear of meeting people or of going new places or trying new things, hate, jealousy, insecurity, are never inherent. These are behaviors.

What Part Stays the Same?
Anything you can think of as a talent or skill is probably an inherent or acquired trait. While these can diminish through lack of use, tarnish by exercising opposing emotions and understandings, or grow by practice and experience, they rarely vanish completely.

Passion for creating or interacting with people, an for example, is probably an inherent trait. Never mistake passion for just an emotion or behavior.

Part II
Next, you have to want to change. Even if you only want to want to change, you're on the right track. You can develop that desire until it drives your life.

How Can I Grow My Desire to Change?
The easiest path is to just develop an awareness of what you want. Cut out pictures that represent it and put them somewhere you'll see them often. Write pages about them and watch them grow. Make goals and take some sort of action toward them. Collect reasons why attaining your goals would be great.